HOLD THE BOAT

Comedy, by Ken Bradbury, 1999

Can you imagine what the Mrs. must have thought of Noah's idea? Here's what happened on the voyage ... probably.

Price includes 2 scripts.

Duration

8 - 10 minutes

    Cast Options

  • 1 Female, 1 Male

Product Id: #247

Price
$12.00
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An excerpt …

(Noah and the family have been too long at sea.)

MIRIAM: (enters ranting, speaking to an unseen family member) Don’t complain to me, he’s your father! I know it’s a mess! No, I don’t know who’s going to clean it up! Talk to him! Talk to your father! Why do you always have to complain to me? Believe me, this isn’t my idea. You can’t talk to your father? I know! I can’t talk to him either! If I’d had any idea on the day we married that I was going to be stuck on this stupid boat …!

NOAH: (entering) Miriam, you are a ninny.

MIRIAM: What?

NOAH: I love you, but you are a ninny. You’re scaring the penguins again. Do you remember what happened last time you scared the penguins? It wasn’t pretty, Marian. I had to clean it up.

MIRIAM: You! You of all people to be talking to me about problems! You, who takes his family on a three-year fun vacation with 2000 animals! Noah, if I could get off this boat, I’d divorce you!

(And what’s more …)

MIRIAM: But, does my husband listen to me?  No! He just brings on more animals! I’m about to lose my mind!

NOAH: I’m not surprised. You’ve been giving me a piece of it all morning. Miriam, I’ve given you the best years of my life.

MIRIAM: If those were the best, then I’d hate to see what’s coming up. Noah, I’ve got to get off this boat.

NOAH: So, what’s stopping you?

MIRIAM: That’s not funny. If you don’t find land soon, we’re all going to go nuts.

(There’s a nice ending.)

MIRIAM: The boat’s not moving, Noah! Great! Now we’re stuck on … NOAH: (finally moving to break free) Come … come, let’s go look.

NOAH: It’s time to … (and they both stop dead in their tracks, looking out in amazement at something)

MIRIAM: Noah! (clasps her hand over her mouth in shock and delight)

NOAH: (whispering) Oh my dear God …

MIRIAM: What? What is it?

NOAH: A rainbow. It’s a rainbow, Miriam.

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